my day so far

1:30 am: pass out with green stamp and "smoky" eye makeup still on

6:45 am: alarm goes off

7:30 am: attempt to get up

7:31 am: decide to lay down for a while

7:46 am: review outbox on phone to determine if any inappropriate text messages were sent

7:52 am: decide that i need to get up and get ready for work

8:00 am: actually get up

8:03 am: look in the mirror and decide i need to remember to remove make up before passing out

8:04 am: wonder at how i got eyeliner on my upper arm

8:19 am: remember that i need 3 random pieces of paper before i can leave the house

8:31 am: apartment has been torn apart looking for paper. decide not worth it to attempt to put apartment back together.

8:33 am: find one piece of paper.

8:37 am: decide it's not worth it to find the other two

9:20 am: arrive at work hoping no one will notice that i didn't get all the green stamp off of my hand